new year's eve's over. the fun's over. or so maybe i didn't really have fun.
family dinner again at my house. my cousins just came back from their holidays. the house was obviously lively. was supposed to go for countdown but decided not to go in the end since it's quite dangerous for me to do so. aww, i missed all the fun they had! the new year would have been fun if i went there too! :(
anyway, a year's gone again. i've felt all the emotions anyone can get- happiness, confusion, regret, joy, anguish, sorrow, pain, everything you can ever imagine. it's all there. days sometimes felt like years, but a year just felt like a snap. and although half of it sucked, the other half was overpowered by showers of love and joy. but honestly, there too was a mixture of memories that i thought would happen again. yes, i knew i was dreaming. though sometimes i can't help but decieve myself. ahh, but all that meant to me will eventually be a memory. a memory of a time when i tried so hard, and got so far. but in the end, it doesn't even matter.
---,
there was a screw up. hotel rendezvous changed to some hot pot restaurant. but it was delicious too. shopping with my sister, ended up shedding tears on a dress. how bad can that get? aww, but i was sort of given a consolation prize. globetrotter's platter with milkshake, plus a big plate of baby back ribs. every bone just for me! yep, on the house! people are so sweet nowadays. :)
okay, i've been eating like an absolute pig since the hols have started. thank god schools reopening, or maybe i'll take back my words. damn. 2 more days to school. eww.
---
there were little things that i failed to recognise. i failed to recognise that i was actually in love with the little things that were once ammunition against a long desired goal, a forever lasting hope. in my lifetime i have never felt loved, i have never felt adored, i have never felt wanted.
family dinner again at my house. my cousins just came back from their holidays. the house was obviously lively. was supposed to go for countdown but decided not to go in the end since it's quite dangerous for me to do so. aww, i missed all the fun they had! the new year would have been fun if i went there too! :(
anyway, a year's gone again. i've felt all the emotions anyone can get- happiness, confusion, regret, joy, anguish, sorrow, pain, everything you can ever imagine. it's all there. days sometimes felt like years, but a year just felt like a snap. and although half of it sucked, the other half was overpowered by showers of love and joy. but honestly, there too was a mixture of memories that i thought would happen again. yes, i knew i was dreaming. though sometimes i can't help but decieve myself. ahh, but all that meant to me will eventually be a memory. a memory of a time when i tried so hard, and got so far. but in the end, it doesn't even matter.
---,
there was a screw up. hotel rendezvous changed to some hot pot restaurant. but it was delicious too. shopping with my sister, ended up shedding tears on a dress. how bad can that get? aww, but i was sort of given a consolation prize. globetrotter's platter with milkshake, plus a big plate of baby back ribs. every bone just for me! yep, on the house! people are so sweet nowadays. :)
okay, i've been eating like an absolute pig since the hols have started. thank god schools reopening, or maybe i'll take back my words. damn. 2 more days to school. eww.
---
there were little things that i failed to recognise. i failed to recognise that i was actually in love with the little things that were once ammunition against a long desired goal, a forever lasting hope. in my lifetime i have never felt loved, i have never felt adored, i have never felt wanted.
